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All skin and no shame

...innocence is just an illusion...

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Drabble: Stars
Title: Drabble: Stars
Pairing: HoMin
Rating: PG
Length: Drabble
Genre: Non-AU
Disclaimer: I don't own anything apart from the story.

Summary: There are times when we search and yearn for things we cannot touch or see, so what happens when we realize that we’ve always had it? Now that’s a question..

AN: What are we searching for? I wonder sometimes...


Yunho eyes the lump on one end of the huge king size bed in the hotel room. The man is practically dangling off the edge of the bed, curled up so soundly with one arm hanging loose, his soft snores are the only sound in the room.

He contemplates the expanse of bed behind the sleeping man, and makes his decision.

The man turns, hobbling slightly to take the weight off his slightly sore ankle, he goes through the adjoining door into the other room. The younger man is exhausted, still trying to get used to a tour schedule so tight it barely gives them room to breathe, and Yunho knows his other half needs a good sleep.

And since his injury, a good sleep is almost a guaranteed impossibility for anyone lying next to him.

Already prone to sleeping at weird angles, it gets worse with his sore leg as he finds all kinds of new positions in the middle of the night, upsetting the sleep of whoever is with him.

Though really, it’s only been one person.

The dark circles and red rimmed eyes speak for themselves, even though Changmin doesn’t say a word about it as he nags Yunho into using his crutches while in their apartment in Tokyo or in any hotel room they happen to be in. He disregards Yunho’s insistence that he no longer needs it, checking in the awkward piece of luggage wherever they go.

It doesn’t matter that Yunho can now dance on his injured foot.

It doesn’t matter that he can walk just fine without help.

Changmin still gets an stark look in his eyes whenever he thinks Yunho is overdoing it.

He keeps it to himself, but Yunho can tell from the tightening of those expressive bambi eyes and the unhappy curl of his mouth. There are times during the strenuous practices when he knows Changmin is thisclose to storming off to grab his crutches and hit him over the head with them just to drive his point home.

You want injured? I’ll give you injured.

But the maknae has learned his lesson about excessive displays of emotion over Yunho. They were forced apart in South Korea because of it, and he is not about to let that happen in Japan too.

No, he corrects in his mind.

Not maknae.

Changmin is a grown man and it’s just the two of them.


His partner.

Yunho lies back on the comfortable mattress, flinching as pain shoots up his leg as he forces it under the tight covers of the bed. Changmin normally turns down the sheets, eliminating this possibility altogether, but he never imagined the spare hotel room would actually be used.

The leader of Tohoshinki is willing be subjected to a diatribe in the morning, but the important thing is that Changmin gets some sleep.

He closes his eyes, waiting for sleep to overcome him after their long day.

It doesn’t take long.

Ten minutes at the most, when Yunho hears muttering coming from the room he’d vacated. He closes his eyes, feigning sleep as he hears the telltale shuffling of someone coming through the door with a lot of baggage.

He resists the urge to take a peek, as a body lands in the bed next to him, sprawling right on top of him, and he cannot quite keep the ooof sound he makes as the breath is fair knocked out of him.

“Serves you right,” a voice mutters somewhere in the vicinity of his chest.

Yunho opens his eyes to find a mop of curls in his face. Fragrant curls.

He inhales deeply, and the head creeps a little further up his chest till his mouth is pressed against a smooth forehead.

“You need to sleep.”

“I was asleep till you decided to sleep in this room.”

“That means you weren’t asleep if you knew that.”

“Why do I even bother?” the younger man asks as he throws a leg carefully over Yunho’s.

Nothing misses him though as he feels the tenseness in the older man’s body.

He lifts his head up, peering at the leader in the dim light as if searching for something.

Yunho looks away, willing the throbbing pain to dissipate as he stares out the window at the darkened sky outside, and his mind takes a fanciful turn as the weariness overtakes him. He wishes he could see the stars. He misses seeing stars. He misses the hope that it brings, and the awe that he feels at gazing up at their twinkling existence. A beauty so understated yet profound, and makes him happy that he’s alive. Stars are dependable. They are always there, even though you cannot see them all the time. He’d like to though. Just one little star. Would that be too much to ask?

He can barely remember the last time he saw stars, and the one occasion he does recall them is from a time long gone in the balmy, heavenly paradise of Bora Bora. Living in metropolitan cities whether in Japan or in South Korea, he’s pretty sure he hasn’t seen stars in a very long time.

And for some reason, this makes him sad.

Changmin drops his head, sliding down Yunho’s body till his hand reaches his injured leg, he starts to massage, knowing exactly where to press and how much pressure to exert.

He’s been doing it for weeks on end.

“You don’t have to do that.”

Changmin nuzzles against the side of Yunho’s belly, resisting the urge to bite the soft flesh as a warning.

He kisses him instead.

Yunho continues to stare out the window, eyes continuing to search for the elusive stars he knows are there, as his hand finds purchase in Changmin’s soft curls and he rubs the man’s scalp gently. The ache in his foot is easing exponentially, and for the millionth time, he wonders why he doesn’t take the comfort offered so willingly to him.

Why must he always resist?

Why does he always fight it?


This young man is his to protect, not the other way round.


“Stop over thinking it.”

“Should I worry that you always know what I’m thinking?”

“That’s just because you’re predictable.”

“You’re so tired, Changdollie. You need a good night’s sleep.”

“I sleep just fine.”

“No, you don’t.”

Changmin stops his massage and lifts his head up, dark eyes penetrating in their intensity as he stares up at his leader.

A leader who is still staring out the window, looking for the stars he cannot see.

“You know I can’t sleep without you.”

“Yes, you can. I saw the Mimi behind the scenes, Changdol-ah.”

“I can nap anywhere, but I cannot sleep without you.”

“There’s a difference?”

“Don’t be obtuse.”

Yunho chuckles quietly as he scrapes his nails over the younger man’s scalp, feeling the tension slowly melting off Changmin as he drops his head again and sinks deeper against his body. His ankle is feeling a lot better, and his awareness is fully fixated on the long body wrapped around his lower half.

He feels fingers dancing up his opposite thigh as Changmin drags himself heavily up his body, fingers leisurely skimming his topless torso as he settles himself against Yunho’s side.

Tucked under his arm.

For a man who in reality is almost two inches taller than Yunho, Changmin has practically made it an art form the way he folds himself to be small enough to be tucked under an armpit.

He snuggles, crossing a long arm over Yunho’s broad chest, he hugs tight, making like a koala he always turns into when they’re alone.

Cheek pressed against Yunho’s chest, Changmin stares out the window with the older man.

“What are you looking at?”

“A star.”

Changmin tries to find these stars, but he sees nothing. His eyes search, and his hold of Yunho tightens in his determination to see what the other man sees.

It is quiet, the two men breathing in tandem as they both search the empty night sky.

They’re both thinking the same thing.

They’re both feeling the same pang.

But they don’t speak of it.


They’ve always only ever associated it with one thing.

But it doesn’t have to be this way, does it?

Yunho breaks the mold, his thoughts moving away from that one thing, to another memory of a shared time with a man who hates horror movies and picks the weirdest things to watch to replace them.

“Are we human because we gaze at the stars, or do we gaze at them because we are human?”

Changmin lifts his head in surprise, finding that Yunho is no longer staring out the window as their eyes meet.

“And do the stars gaze back?”

Stars are dependable. They are always there, even when you cannot see them.

Yunho cups Changmin’s cheek, his voice gentle as he feels a warmth spreading through him at the complete trust and love in the younger man’s dark eyes.

“This one does.”

AN: You know… I really cannot figure out my muses. I wanted to write a story about naggy Chami but somehow it didn’t work out for me.

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I was about to sleep and this will help me to dream about beautiful things. You're always so talented with words, i can imagine everything you described happening in real life. That's what is so special about your writing, you capture their essence and translate into moving and captivating stories, and many times, very realistic . Not many capture the nuances of their relationship as you do. Thank you! ^___^

This was beautiful. So beautiful. Their relationship in all its intricacies will always be something beyond poignant and something so essentially them. Nothing on Earth can replace what they have for each other.

Changmin is Yunho's Northern star. His guiding light. I will always believe that.

So, really, thank you for writing this.

"For a man who in reality is almost two inches taller than Yunho, Changmin has practically made it an art form the way he folds himself to be small enough to be tucked under an armpit"

I'm smiling like a crazy person at the image this line gave me. the whole drabble is just all kinds of perfection. Thank you for this...you really made my day!

This is sweet. A tad bit bittersweet, yet still sweet.

i love everything about this! everything.

changmin is my bias destroyer at the moment.

him and that yoochun jerk!

This one seemed more special then the rest. Sonething about stars.

Aigo, I really love, admire, and yet hate how RL Yunho overworks himself even when injured. I know he does it for us fans but I wish he knew we AS fans would love for him to sit down and get better (if only SM would acquiesce, but I disgress...) I'm glad that Minnie is always so protective of his hyung :)

Also, side note and off topic, but I had to watch that gif three times cause I thought Changmin was Yunho and was like, why are there 2 Yunho's?! Not that that'd be a bad thing per say, but guh! When they're styled similarly sometimes I have trouble telling them apart QQ

So many updates! *feeling spoilt* XD

awhhhh this is so sweet :'3

your homin non-AUs are always simple and straightforward but deep. thank you for this lovely surprise, nicki :')

Edited at 2014-05-08 04:29 pm (UTC)

such a gorgeous piece of writing ;; I was drowned in it. Thanks for writing!

And just like that the song "Star” of Reamonn came to my mind
Beatiful perfection both of them - the fic and HoMin
Homin always soothe my heart
Thank u for this

I love stars. Thank you for this.. ^^

Such a sweet drabble.
I always appreciate stories of how Yunho now treats Changmin more than his equal, his pillar of strength.
I think they gain both strength and courage and determination from each other, they fuel each other and yet they are willing to step back and wait for one another should there be a need to.
I think this is the best type of partnership in any relationship.

Gah!!! What the .... Would be better if it was YunJae.

Aww, this makes me sad for some reason. It's really sweet though. I guess I get a little emotional thinking about Changmin taking care of Yunho all by himself now that the others are gone. You described how he acts perfectly.. always concerned, always there. I don't think I'll ever be a "shipper" but their bond is undeniable. Unbreakable. They've gone through so much together. Anyway, I'm glad Changmin is there to keep Yunho in line (or try to! LOL) excitable leadersshi doesn't usually listen OTL I hope his ankle is okay! Oh and this made me laugh:

You want injured? I’ll give you injured.

That's so Changmin LOL!

Okay, it's late and I can't think anymore. Your fics make me think too much OTL but overall that's a good thing.^^ Beautifully written, as always. Thanks for sharing!<3

I just read this thrice in a row, and I can't stop cooing at it. THE ENDING ;; <3
This entire drabble just shot a HoMin arrow straight to my heart and the feels are overwhelming. IDEK if that makes sense, sorry.
Oh and IDK if I'm going to do justice to your talent as a writer by saying this but I do want to let you know - I feel like the way you've written HoMin here and the way you've written them in so many of your other drabbles/oneshots encompasses their RL bond and relationship so beautifully, I don't think I would want to read any other HoMin besides yours, especially non-AU. The way you write them is love.

It's beautiful... I love the way you write about their character and the emotion they feel.
I just love it!

this was sweet, to summarize in one word... yunho is such a workaholic, i'd imagine i'd be driven insane if i were in changmin's shoes... but changmin is the only one who can control his hyung~ in a way... but yeah... minnie loves his hyung enough that he cannot sleep without him. :)

finally yunho gets over himself and lets himself FEEL. lucky maknae~^^

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