Genre: Non-AU, angst, fluff, romance
Disclaimer: I don't own anything apart from the story. I wish I had YunJae and if I had my way, they'd move to New Zealand so they can be civil-unionised here
Summary: A script for a new mini-series is left in Yunho’s apartment by his manager, and as he reads it, he becomes more and more intrigued. Unbeknownst to him, one of the leads has already been cast, and the contracts signed. When he too is cast in the project after expressing interest in the part, he gets the shock of his life when he arrives for the script reading to be faced with a person from his past. Someone that he has spent years trying to pretend never existed. How will they be able to get through filming this without killing each other? Or worse…
AN1: Jaejoong is so beautiful I’ve basically lost all my vocabulary skills trying to describe him… He was fucking luminous in Shanghai last night ugh… So dead…
AN2: Oh and if you’re a new reader who has never read ICE, I really think you should because I will make a few references to it without actually spelling it out because the assumption is that everyone has read ICE and are familiar with the plot…
Changmin meets Yunho just as he comes through the door leading to the roof. The dried tear streaks make him pause, but the bloodied knuckles make his heart stop when he sees them as Yunho wipes at his eyes with the palm of his injured hand.
Yunho drops his hand quickly at the startled exclamation from the familiar voice, and he blinks to clear his vision, seeing Changmin staring at him from the stairs, mouth gaping in horror.
“What have you done…?” Changmin’s voice is stricken, as he stares at the back of Yunho’s hand, and then back up at his leader’s face.
Yunho follows his line of sight, finally feeling the dull throb in his hand as he flexes it. He brings his fist up to examine it, before shaking his head, unable to feel anything from Changmin’s lack of faith and trust in him because he is spent for the day. He is running on empty.
“He needs you,” is his hollow response, before he walks down the stairs, pushing past Changmin, ignoring the younger man as he calls after him.
Changmin is torn between running after Yunho, and going to check on Jaejoong. After his calls to the man fall on deaf ears, Yunho retreating further down the stairs, Changmin decides to listen to his leader and check on the other man.
The sight that greets him sends him running, as he sees Jaejoong sitting in a crumpled heap on the ground, hugging his knees with his head bent and shaking so violently he can actually see it even at a distance.
He comes to a skidding halt in front of the man, and he can hear the harsh sobs coming from him, the agony in them is heartrending, and it reminds him of that afternoon so long ago.
The deep sense of deja vu eats at him, as he once again bends down to scoop the broken lead singer up in his arms.
Jaejoong does not protest, and Changmin leans against the wall, painfully aware at how light the other man is. How thin. How frail. Even without scales, he guesses that Jaejoong is at least five to seven kilos lighter than he was the last time he carried the man like this, and even then the man did not have enough weight to lose.
“Hyung…” he whispers, “did Yunho hyung hurt you?”
The reaction is swift and immediate, causing Changmin to actually drop the older man in shock as he is slapped across the jaw. The hit is weak, and pulled back at the last moment, but not expecting it at all, the maknae is completely stunned.
But Changmin does not have a chance to complete his question as Jaejoong returns to his feet, hissing in anger.
“How dare you assume such a thing of your hyung? How dare you? Haven’t you lived with the man for almost a decade? You’ve lived with him longer than I have and yet you dare ask me such a thing?”
Jaejoong punches Changmin in the shoulder, a glancing hit, but the younger man is too shocked to care.
“Do you know how much I wish I can say the same? If I can say that we’ve been together for a decade? But I cannot, Changmin. And yet even I know that he would never hurt me the way I hurt him. What is wrong with me? Why does he make me so crazy?”
Jaejoong collapses against Changmin’s chest, sobbing, clutching desperately at the front of the man’s shirt.
“I thought he would hit me today, he was so angry. But he didn’t. He never has. You know this, Min-ah. But I’ve hit him. I’ve punched him. And yet he returns it all with gentleness. The strong leader of TVXQ, and I’ve made a mockery of him. I, who claim to love him, has hurt him far more than anyone else has. What the hell is wrong with me?”
Changmin listens and he hears, and despite the multitude of questions on the tip of his tongue, he only asks the one.
“You love him?”
“Of course I love him, you fool! I loved him then, I love him now. I’ve never stopped loving him. I’ve hated him for years though for cutting me out without giving me a chance to explain. I kept telling myself he should have listened, he should have let me explain. I called him almost daily for a whole year but he never answered my calls. I just wanted to explain, and being ignored like that, as if I didn’t exist, hurt more than I care to remember. I felt so angry with him for throwing away the six years we had together just like that. But I now realise I should have said something before we filed the lawsuit. I realise now that I assumed too much. I assumed he knew I was going ahead with it. I assumed he would understand why I had to leave. Why we had to leave. I couldn’t sit back and watch SME making a fool out of him and his hard work. My reasons for leaving were for him. I wanted a better life for him and for us. I never imagined for one second he would cut me out so completely. I assumed too much, and I paid the price. And now I’m still hurting him. What is wrong with me? I’m so confused.”
Changmin hugs the shorter man, patting at his shoulder as he stares out over the city. Everything Jaejoong is saying is not news to him, but hearing it from the man himself, the clear pain in his voice, and his vigorous defence of their leader, gives Changmin a sense of hope. But it still does not explain what happened today.
“You need to tell him. You can’t tell me and not tell him. You two really need to talk.”
Jaejoong lets out a bitter laugh, wiping away at his tears.
“Oh, I know we need to talk. But how? I feel like this whole thing is a sad one-sided love affair.”
Changmin draws back, pushing Jaejoong away from him and staring at him incredulously.
“Are you blind?”
“Wow, I sure do miss you. Here I am, crying and heartbroken and there you are being Changmin.”
“But I am Changmin.”
“M-E-A-N. Yes, you are indeed Changmean.”
“Hyung, I’m not joking,” Changmin frowns as Jaejoong chuckles humourlessly. There is a resigned droop in the man’s shoulders and his words sound brittle to his ears. Can this man really be that oblivious?
“Fine. Tell me what you mean. I don’t understand you.”
“Yunho hyung loves you.”
Jaejoong scoffs immediately, pulling himself out of Changmin’s arms and trying to walk away.
He staggers, trying to find his footing after losing his support, and Changmin steps forward quickly and scoops the man back into his arms, ignoring the protests and the weak pounding of his chest and shoulders by ineffectual fists. He leans back against the wall and stares at the still-beautiful man in his arms.
“Hyung, stop. I’m much stronger than you, and your struggling will be in vain. I’m not letting you go till you listen.”
Jaejoong stops struggling, knowing it is futile. His mouth is pursed unhappily and he stares ahead of him, feeling a little put upon. Bad enough he is being manhandled by his dongsaeng, and from the sounds of it, the man is probably about to give him a piece of his mind. He is far too tired, both physically and emotionally to fight though. Yunho’s words from earlier are still resounding in his ears.
This is not a game. This is my heart.
Why is he like this?
“Are you done feeling sorry for yourself yet? Why can’t the two of you get it into your stubborn heads that both of you are hurting from this. Neither of you hurt more than the other. Both of you hurt, period. You hurt because Yunho hyung isn’t by your side and he hurts because you aren’t by his side. The fact that the separation is in part due to your lack of communication is beside the point.”
“But he won’t listen.”
Changmin hefts Jaejoong higher in his arms, briefly feeling a little remorse as he remembers the game with Yunho. He probably has a good ten kilos on his hyung at the moment, and Yunho had been sick during the filming of Gods of Victory. But he knocks away the stray thought as he glares at the bent head of the lead singer.
“He won’t listen and you didn’t say anything. How is he supposed to listen when you were saying sweet fuck all? I know you tried to contact him after you guys left but don’t you think that was too little too late? Why didn’t you talk before you left?”
“I tried—“ but Jaejoong is cut off when Changmin growls.
“No, you did not. I’m talking about before you filed the lawsuit not after. Why the hell didn’t you talk to him then?”
“I thought he knew…”
“Hyung,” Changmin starts, shaking his head and sighing. “The two of you are really bad for each other you know that? You can’t see anything but him and he can’t see anything but you, and because of that, both of you don’t talk because you don’t need to talk. In most instances that would have been fine. Not talking because you know what he wants for dinner is fine. Not talking because he knows you’re tired and you want a back rub is fine. Not talking because you two are in accord about what management is asking, and you are happy for him to speak for you is fine. Not talking because you know he loves you and you love him is fine. Not talking because no words are needed when the two of you send bedroom eyes at each other across the goddamn room is fine.”
Changmin pauses, taking a deep breath before continuing.
“But this? This was so huge and would impact on all of us and you assumed he knew you were not going to leave him? Does that even make any fucking sense when all he sees is the sun fucking rising out of your scrawny ass? How can you think he would ever imagine that you would leave him? Hell, even I was shocked and I know hyungs were too, though I think they were relieved you were going along.”
“But—“ and yet again Jaejoong is cut off when Changmin shakes his head.
“Yes, ok, I understand you tried to talk to him and he cut you off. Can you blame him though? Can you blame him? Have you ever thought for one instant how he felt. Put yourself in his shoes. The man you love past anything in this world suddenly pulls the rug from under you and says see you later!”
Changmin squeezes the man in his arms as Jaejoong makes to protest once again.
“I know you were not saying goodbye, but put yourself in his shoes. You get upset when he goes out with his friends without you. You get upset when you think he’s not paying you enough attention. You even get upset when he snuggles with Yoochun hyung, your self-proclaimed fucking soulmate. How would you feel if he told you he was leaving with them when you had already decided to stay because your family were concerned as to what might happen to you if you left? If you were responsible for your entire family, and the unknown was too much for them to understand and you had to stay. How would you have felt if he left anyway, without talking to you about it?”
Jaejoong is silent, but the tears rolling down his cheeks is testament enough that he is listening, and so Changmin goes on, knowing that if he waits for these two to get their heads out of their asses and see past their own hurts, they will be at each other’s throats for the majority of the filming, and he is not equipped to deal with that, NDA or not. The bickering of lovers has a certain quality to it, and Yunho and Jaejoong hyung have it down pat. And this is even after not seeing each other for over three years. Their blindness astounds him.
“Can you see it now? He refuses to even discuss you to me, but I’ll be damned if I let at least one of you get away with wilful ignorance. He cried listening to your album, hyung. He was so upset. If he hated you he wouldn’t have bothered even buying it. If he hated you, he wouldn’t have cried. Those were tears of sorrow and regret. I’ve almost never seen or heard him cry since you left but that day, he cried. He was so proud of you at your fan meet. I dug up a fancam and made him watch it as practice because he wasn’t sure he was able to act well enough for this role, and he smiled while watching it, even as a tear rolled down his cheek. Do you really think he doesn’t love you?”
Changmin finally falls silent, now tired himself, but he doesn’t want to let go of the crying man. If Yunho will not take his counsel or comfort, he will give it to Jaejoong. Between the two of them, he really cannot say which is stronger. They each have their own strengths and weaknesses, and unfortunately, they both are each other’s.
Jaejoong is Yunho’s strength and weakness.
Yunho is Jaejoong’s strength and weakness.
It has always been this way. Without each other, they survive, but they are not living, and he for one is sick of watching them like this.
I love you.
His mind taunts him.
I love you.
His conscience pricks at him as he walks slowly down the stairs, ignoring Changmin’s calls to him, his mind full of Jaejoong and his words.
I love you.
Twice the man has said it. The first time Yunho had been too angry, and Jaejoong’s eyes clouded over with too many other emotions and a goodly amount of lust for him to read them properly, but this time the truth behind those words is undeniable, and he could see them despite his anger and hurt.
I don't know, Yunho.
And he remembers the frustration of the older man. Both in his words, and his mannerisms. Jaejoong had been upset with himself, and thoroughly frustrated. Maybe even anguished to a certain extent.
I don't know you.
Those words ring true. But how far does his extent of not knowing go? Is he really that blind? Does he really not know?
I just know me and it is already fucking torture for me.
Yunho pauses, not taking another step as he closes his eyes. He runs through Jaejoong’s actions in his head with a detached eye, ignoring his own feelings in the matter, knowing that his emotions have coloured his perceptions. He remembers the shock in Jaejoong’s eyes at Joong Ki’s words, and the burst of colour in his cheeks.
The shock in his eyes.
Jaejoong had not meant for him to be jealous of the man. But the lyrics of the song, and the fact that pretty boy Joong Ki knew the words, and then finding out Jaejoong had written it with another man, was all that Yunho could see and feel and the burst of fury in his chest and soul-eating jealousy had made him blind.
I can’t be friends.
The lead singer had been beside himself as he uttered those words. And Yunho, calm now and away from the energy between himself and Jaejoong that sucks him in can be objective. He rewinds the scene in his head, and he can hear the anguish in Jaejoong’s words.
I just can’t but I didn’t want to be the one admitting it…
He had been right about only one thing, as he grips the banister, the sharp pain in his hand when he does so is nothing compared to any of the emotional pain he has ever been through. He had been right that Jaejoong had wanted him to crack first, but the man had not set him up to fail. It had not been premeditated, but rather, one of Jaejoong’s hare-brained schemes where he leaps before he looks. He had wanted Yunho to cross the line first, but why?
I love you.
Has Yunho ever said it back? Even as he asks the question, he knows he has not because he thought Jaejoong knew.
Assumptions will be the end of them.
He does not know completely know Jaejoong now, but his actions are familiar. The actions of an insecure man, wanting attention despite knowing of his love. Back when they were together, it was a game Jaejoong played sometimes to force Yunho to be a rougher lover. Sometimes it really is just because the beautiful man is feeling neglected. As the leader of the biggest group to come out of South Korea, Yunho is usually pulled in a myriad of different directions by an assortment of people all wanting a piece of him and his group that he is determined to protect.
But he always knows where his Jaejoongie is, no matter the chaos.
But Jaejoong, pushed aside in the frenzy, always feels lost and cast adrift without Yunho, and so he does whatever he thinks he needs to, in order to get that attention back on him.
An attention he never ever lost.
But the painfully insecure man cannot seem to get that, and Yunho never tired of reminding him.
Except for that one time in Japan where his emotions over the lawsuit had made his actions a lot more thoughtless than necessary. He had definitely been ignoring Jaejoong then, but not out of cruelty, but out of need. He needed time to regroup and to re-evaluate, and Jaejoong, already shaken by the fact that Yunho had not expected him to file the lawsuit, did the only thing he knew how to make his lover come to heel. And the result of that was Jaejoong had been much too marked in too many visible places.
His upper back.
Even his fucking ankle.
Covered almost literally from head to toe in bruises from an angry lover’s kisses and touches, with a full schedule for the next three days, Jaejoong had made the makeup noona shriek when she had seen him, and this was after the man’s attempts at covering them up himself. In the height of summer, instead of sleeveless shirts or short sleeved teeshirts, their wardrobe had to be changed because cover up as they tried, it was impossible to hide every mark.
Yunho smiles ruefully at the memory of the angry makeup and coordi noonas, not to mention the managers and Avex executives. They all knew, and no one said anything, but there had been anger at his thoughtlessness.
That had been the last time Jaejoong had pulled a stunt like that.
I can’t be friends.
Yunho knows they cannot, which is why he had been so angry. He is trying, and Jaejoong blithely throws his attempts in his face.
No, that’s not what the man was trying to do. He needs stop thinking the worst of every action. He is too blinded by past hurts to see clearly, but he really needs to. For both their sakes, he needs to.
I love you.
“I fucking love you too, you stupid man.”
And with that, Yunho turns around, taking the steps two at a time as he heads back up to the roof.
Changmin looks up, suddenly aware that they are not alone, and his eyes meet dark almond ones. The relief he feels is immeasurable, but he sends a warning look at Yunho regardless, who acknowledges it with a tilt of his head, before wordlessly asking for Jaejoong to be passed to him.
The maknae pushes himself away from the wall, passing the sobbing lead singer into Yunho’s waiting arms. Jaejoong does not struggle, immediately curling himself into Yunho as if this is a normal everyday occurrence, burying his face against the side of the leader’s head, sniffling quietly, body still shaking as he tries to stop crying.
Yunho rubs his cheek against Jaejoong’s nose, making Changmin hide a smile at the telling action. The leader then instructs him quietly.
“Buy us some time, Min-ah. I don't care how you do it, you're a smart boy. Just buy us some time. Tell them I had an accident and Jaejoong is tending to me. Tell them not to worry, but if you can grab a first aid kit that would be helpful. Don't let anyone come up here. Send Yeon Hee if you need to if you need to stay to make sure no one looks for us. I know I'm asking too much from you but please, can you do me this one favour and I'll make sure Jaejoong cooks you your favourite meal this weekend.”
Jaejoong’s ears perk up as he listens to Yunho’s instructions, drawing back, tears clinging to his lashes as he blinks at his former lover, mouth automatically pursing into a tiny pout.
“Why are you promising him something on my behalf? I could be busy this weekend!”
Yunho turns his head, whispering against the fragrant skin of the older man, “One meal, and I'll help.”
“Oh no, no, no, you stay out of my kitchen! Min you can help me if you want.”
Jaejoong turns to the youngest member who is definitely not hiding a smile now. But then his expression changes, doe eye widening as he returns his gaze to Yunho.
“Why the hell do you need a first aid kit?”
“You should have hit me, not the wall,” Jaejoong whispers, remorse suffocating his voice, not noticing that Changmin has left them, the maknae sneaking away quickly and quietly.
He is loathe to leave his hyungs along, but he knows they will be alright. Jaejoong might be willing to listen now, and for Yunho to have come back, no longer angry no less, gives him hope. He practically runs down the stairs, knowing he will need to do a lot of fast talking to get them out of this mess.
Yunho and Jaejoong. Together they are trouble, but apart it is far worse for them. Changmin would rather lie till he is blue in the face than have to deal with a robotic Yunho or a crying Jaejoong again.
Deflect, deflect, deflect.
Yoochun’s words ring in his head, and he pops his phone open to send the man a quick message.
I found them. I have faith they will work this out.
The reply is almost instantaneous, as if Yoochun had been waiting for a message from him.
Jaejoongie hyung is still all pale white flawless skin? No more screaming makeup girls?
Changmin laughs as he exits onto the floor of the script reading, texting back with a rueful smile.
I think hyung would have preferred the screaming makeup girls. Yunho hyung had bleeding knuckles though but Jaejoong hyung was unmarked. Completely unmarked as far as I can see.
Bleeding? Changmin! Don’t just leave it at that. What the hell happened?
I don’t know. I actually don’t know. You know how Yunho hyung is. I have a feeling he punched a wall or something. His broken hand remark is suddenly coming back to me.
Yoochun shakes his head, as he tilts his head to look Junsu whose teardrop eyes slowly fill with tears as he reads the same message.
“Why is he being like that?”
“Better the wall than Jaejoong…”
“But his hand.”
“Better the wall than Jaejoong. Yunho would never forgive himself if he hurt him.”
“Why are they like this?”
“I don’t know…it’s a good and bad thing that they evoke such extreme emotions in each other and right now, it’s a good thing I think…I hope…”
“Please punch me instead of a wall if you ever feel the need.”
Yoochun shakes his head, once again curling up closer to Junsu, sliding down slightly so his cheek is against Junsu’s chest as he wraps an arm behind the younger man, while his free hand sends a text message back.
As long as they’re ok. Remember to update me later, please. I doubt Jaejoong hyung will talk to me, but you never know.
Will do. He promised to make me a meal this weekend ^^
Are we invited?
Hey, I’m not sharing my food with you! You had him for the last three plus years. This is my first edible home cooked meal in the same amount of time. Leave me alone!
Changmin smirks, before pocketing his phone and squaring his shoulders to mentally prepare himself for the firing squad. A little melodramatic, but he usually has his hyungs with him to run interference. This time there is only him and he is feeling the pressure.
But as he remembers the look in Yunho’s eyes as his leader nuzzles against the pale lead singer’s cheek, he knows any trouble is worth his discomfort.
Yoochun laughs as he shows Junsu the last message from the maknae.
“I don’t understand.”
“You didn’t read the script?”
“I read parts of it. Isn’t that Yunho hyung’s line?”
“You know, I can actually understand how that would make you feel a little uh…um…”
“Aroused?” comes the amused response as Yoochun lifts his head from Junsu’s chest to watch the younger man flush.
“I don’t know about aroused.”
“Want me to try?”
“Yah! Don’t tease me! Junsu shoves Yoochun away grouching as the older man chuckles.
Yoochun leans back, mouth quirked into a smirk, as he bends his head, gazing up at Junsu who is staring at him suspiciously. He flutters his eyelashes coquettishly, a little exaggeratedly as he stares up from underneath them, mouth parted as he breathes out the word.
“I would never hit you.”
“I know, but you should have. Put me down, I want to look at your hand.”
“You can look at it later, but right now we need to talk. I can see truth in your eyes, I know you mean what you say, I just don't know why I can't seem to hear the words. I know you said we get one question for every episode but I think you owe me one for today and I'll answer whatever you want in return.”
Yunho settles himself against the wall, before he slides down carefully, feeling the fabric of his jacket snagging and tearing on the uneven surface, but not caring. His thighs take the weight of Jaejoong in his arms, as well as of himself, as he lowers them carefully to the ground, into a low squat, before allowing his legs to fold, collapsing the rest of the short distance with a grunt.
The jarring motion elicits a soft gasp from Jaejoong, and he feels his breath caressing his skin once again. It will be so easy to turn his head and capture that beautiful mouth and taste him and take him again for his own, but Yunho tamps down the urge, knowing and recognising that this is always where they go wrong. One kiss and they will be lost, and everything that needs to be said will be swept under the rug.
“Can I ask you my question first before you ask me yours?” Jaejoong’s voice is tiny as he stares at his hands clasped in his lap.
“No, Jaejoong. You had your chance with laying down the terms. This time I'm laying down mine. I'm asking my question first then you can ask yours.”
Yunho chuckles wryly as Jaejoong’s mouth forms an unhappy moue, his lips wet as he licks at them, and then his pout gets even more pronounced. But Yunho is made of stronger stuff now, and he shakes his head.
“I know I would have given in to you years ago. One little pout and I was lost. I don't think I'm immune to your pouts now then I was back then but I'm a little stronger now.”
Jaejoong immediately sucks in his pout at the younger man’s words, chewing on his bottom lip, before speaking quietly.
“What are you sorry for?”
“That you've needed to be strong because of me.”
“Nothing to be sorry about. I should probably thank you.” Yunho reassures, squeezing Jaejoong and rearranging him slightly in his lap.
Jaejoong has so many things to say about that, but he chooses not to as he redirects the conversation back. “What is your question?”
“Why did you get the PDs to add the song and rewrite the ending?”
“The ending hasn't changed. Just an episode or so about six or seven episodes in. PD-nim was exaggerating.”
The beautiful man sighs as he starts fiddling with the lapel of Yunho's jacket, brushing off some dust and lint from it, his forehead rubbing against the other man’s slightly scratchy jaw. The tickling sensation makes him want to smile, but he does not as he takes a deep breath, praying that Changmin is right as he readies to finally lay himself bare.
No more games.
He does not want to play with Yunho’s heart.
He wants his heart.
You never lost it.
That tiny annoying voice again. Well, it is time to find out, as he takes another deep fortifying breath before starting to talk.
“I wanted to tease you, to see if I could still get a reaction from you. I saw Ah In with you and I guess something snapped. I kept asking myself why could he touch you and I couldn’t. And then I realised that it was I who made the rule and because of the stupid rule, I’d basically screwed myself over.”
Jaejoong sighs, slipping a finger into one of Yunho’s button holes and watching his fingertip wiggle on the other side. He refuses to look up and meet Yunho’s eyes because he does not want to see disappointment in them. He has seen enough hurt in his leader’s eyes to last him a lifetime.
“Maybe it was pride, maybe it was foolishness, and I do know there was a healthy dose of jealousy involved but I wanted to see if you still cared enough to react to me. My album is about you, both I and Y. I mean, come on, the album is called Y for no reason whatsoever apart from the obvious.”
A tiny self-deprecating chuckle escapes his lips.
“Even when I refused to talk about you, I was still thinking about you, writing about you, dreaming about you. I’m sorry I hurt you. I truly didn’t mean for you to think I was taunting you with it. I just wanted you to touch me and I couldn’t think of any way you’d do it so I guess I thought I had to provoke you into doing it. Drive you to it…”
Jaejoong trails off, tugging at his finger, a small frown on his face when he realises it is caught in the button hole. He wiggles it, pulling, a small pout forming as his brow furrows as he works to extricate the finger. Yunho’s finger would never get caught in stupid button holes like this. The man’s fingers are long and slim. His are still fat and chubby despite the weight loss.
Yunho closes his eyes as Jaejoong’s small indignant puffs of air wash over his face as the inhumanly gorgeous man struggles to free himself. His words are whirling in his mind, and he knows truth when he hears it. The fact that another man was involved in that song still bugs him a little, but they’ve been apart for so long that he realises he really has no right to get angry about it.
All Jaejoong had wanted was for him to touch him. He should have asked, but then again, how could he? He is right, he had screwed himself over because this was his rule. To ask means to admit he wants to be touched, and then what? Jaejoong, the man who always needed to be reassured of Yunho’s presence and attention even if he did not need constant avowals of love, was bound by his own words. What else could he do?
Yunho wonders if he would have done the same.
Would he play this game if the roles were reversed?
And as he thinks about it, he realises he cannot say yay or nay with certainty. Jaejoong makes him do things he never thinks himself capable of, whether in a positive or negative way. Who knows what he might do if pushed to desperation?
If you want him, come and claim him.
The words come unbidden, residual memories from the Lord of the Rings marathon he was made to sit through in the weekend. He rarely has free time and when he does, he has to sit through that? Admittedly, the movies were interesting and exciting despite being highly confusing.
He hears rather than feels Jaejoong finally free himself from the evil little button hole, as the man squeaks his triumph. A smile tugs at his lips, pulling up a corner and he knows Jaejoong is looking at him because the man suddenly inhales sharply, his breathing pattern changing. Yunho knows better than to open his eyes though, because one look at those beguiling doe eyes and he will forget all his good intentions.
Yunho desperately wants the man.
But he is not ready to claim him just yet.
“You can ask your question now,” Yunho murmurs softly.
Jaejoong, who had been staring at Yunho’s mouth, is about to protest at the lack of a response from the man, but they are interrupted by Changmin who drops a small first aid kit into his lap, amusement lacing his voice as he remarks on his hyungs.
“I’m glad to see you haven’t killed each other yet. I’m not sure if anyone believed me about you tripping down the stairs and slamming into the wall, but Yeon Hee spoke up vouching for your clumsiness so if anyone side eyes you, just stumble around a little ok?”
Yunho does open his eyes then, looking up at the very tall young man smirking down at them.
“Thank you, Min-ah.”
“Yes, thank you,” Jaejoong echoes, but his attention is already on Yunho’s hand as he starts cleaning his knuckles with the alcohol wipes he finds in the first aid kit.
Yunho swallows his wince, but he cannot hide his flinch, and Jaejoong clicks his tongue at him, his grip around his wrist firm despite his smaller size. He has always been stronger than he looks.
Changmin almost laughs at the helpless expression Yunho throws up at him as Jaejoong starts blowing soothingly across his scraped skin after every gentle wipe of the alcohol swabs. The lead singer’s attention is long gone from himself, and he just shakes his head at his leader before backing away quickly, holding up two fingers and then making a fist, and mouthing that he has twenty minutes.
He actually has half an hour, but Changmin prefers to err on the safe side, not putting it past the PDs to send a search squad for the missing couple and NDAs or not, the lesser people who know about them the better.
His last look of the couple is Jaejoong, full on pouting as he is wont to do when concentrating deeply, as he cleans Yunho’s broken skin with a cotton swab. Yunho’s expression is pained, but Changmin is pretty damn sure the pain as nothing to do with his hand.
The chuckle that echoes in the stairwell as he descends from the roof to return to the room is almost evil as he takes out his cellphone to send a text message.
Jaejoong hyung is sitting in Yunho hyung’s lap and pouting.
Yunho hyung is a goner.
AN: LOL that LOTR line was for my twin because she was tweeting freaking LOTR smut randomly and I have no idea why. Gollum and Legolas? Come on, Nicole!!! XDDD!